I gotta find PEACE of mind.....

I’ve been trying to find my peace of mind lately. Struggling really. Post Graduation life hasn’t been all that fulfilling. And I could blame it on the fact that it took what felt like forever to even find employment. And even though I have it’s part time. But I won’t complain. Well at least not anymore.

I mean I’m gonna be honest with myself. What the hell did I expect???! Wait……I’ll tell you. I expected to find full time employment at a nice company (preferably in RTP). To be moving out of my mother’s house within a year...to have settled on a grad school. This WAS my dream…

Let me tell you what I got. Part time employment working as an “After School Counselor”. I’m still at home with my mother and honestly that probably won’t even be changing ANYTIME soon. And grad school....that’s another blog in itself.

BUT….I’ve also come to a few realizations over these past few months.

I love my job. Like I go to work and have fun…I’m not looking at the clock every few seconds, I’m not calling out every other day. Habits that consumed me at my past jobs.

I’m living rent free. I’m actually rather lucky. My mother doesn’t really get on my nerves (for the most part)

And applying to Grad School is a PROCESS. A little more so then undergrad…..

My writers block is slowly disappearing. This blog being evidence!

I’m growing…..it’s a process. THAT”S what I have to keep reminding myself. For some reason I want INSTANT change, INSTANT growth…..but that’s impossible. That’s just not how it works. You have to work at things, it takes TIME…..

I always say that life is a journey…..and it really is. Years equate to steps……our lows are our mountains….bad days are mole hills……you get through it so that you can eventually get to where ever it is your trying to go. Any along this journey we discover things about ourselves, about other people, about the “road” itself that assist us.

And that’s my peace of mind. That’s what calms & brings harmony to me anxiety prone mind. The fact that I’m moving and working.

Slow and Steady……